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News Onicia Updates

The truth about American Greetings – Onicia Updates

Last year I sold eight cards to American Greetings. Since then, many of you have asked when my funny greeting cards will be available for purchase. Well, I contacted American Greetings’ Creative Team and basically it takes years before card ideas hit the shelves.

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Just Being Funny

Wait four months for a hug? Next customer! – Just Being Funny

My super conservative boyfriend pulled out a book about intimacy levels and Christian dating. Great, I love a man with a godly plan. Truthfully, I was not conservative in my corazón and didn’t want to be celibate in my cooch.

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News Onicia Updates

‘Waiting to Exhale’ Sucked! – Onicia Update

Wuz gud, homie? I’m twenty years late but I need to get this off my chest. Waiting to Exhale sucked. It sucked so bad I need to tell the world even if it gets my Black card revoked. Chicago Public Schools are closed but the kids are still getting homework assignments via email. Sucks that […]

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Comedy

Drag King: Bigen hair magic got me feeling sexy

Did a big chop and now I’m feeling like a big shot. Let me introduce you to my drag king alterego, OniciO. Yeah, double capital O ’cause I’m all about dem boobies.

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Fangirlin' Women In Film

Go on and take my Black card, ‘Waiting to Exhale’ sucked!

I can’t believe I waited almost 25 years to watch Waiting to Exhale — is this the iconic film that had so many black women empowered and ready to leave their ain’t ish men??? Well, the film is trash, but the tunes still slams.

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Just Being Funny

Free advice from Satan? You get what you pay for – Just Being Funny

Expecting an extension, I lied about my French homework being on a thumb drive. Instead, my teacher said she’d wait while I printed it. Why are teachers so annoying? Just play along with the lie, gosh man.

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Comedy

The gay test [VIDEO]

Being a teenager is challenging, especially while trying to discover your sexuality. Luckily, Caribbean comedian, Onicia Muller has a test to uncover potential gayness.

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Just Being Funny

Third wheel? Yes. Threesome? NoOoOoOpe! – Just Being Funny

I was excited about the shared condo with a pool until the landlord revealed ongoing renovations, restricted me to the garage entrance, and “advised” me to avoid the doorman at all costs. Was there a pool? Did he even own the unit? I snatched the key fob and wheeled in my suitcases.

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Just Being Funny

Why Death’s bed is the best – fresh insight – Just Being Funny

After covering the box office, my boss basically said I could either wait in the freezing cold until closing time or buy a full-priced ticket to stay indoors. Mind you, I’d made her a sale by inviting my friend.

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Just Being Funny

He try steal me money and me dignity — rude! – Just Being Funny

“Spare some change?” What’s gonna happen when nobody has cash? Should I start carrying old electronics, cans, and other pawnables in my purse? Needy, scammer, angel in disguise – figuring that out is a test all on its own.